The Depression Hole

Written and illustrated by C. Fulsty

Cee, the panda,
is stuck in a hole.

It happened to Cee
as he was taking a stroll.

Cee didn’t mean
to fall right in.

No one plans
on having depression.

The hole is deep,
but Cee is at the top.

With every bad thought,
Cee begins to drop.

The ledges crumble
and Cee falls deeper.

The lower Cee gets,
the hole gets steeper.

Cee doesn’t know
others are stuck too.

They’re in a depression hole,
Cee never knew.

Cee thinks, “My life is good.
I shouldn’t feel sad.”

Cee falls further
because of thoughts that are bad.

Cee doesn’t think
he will ever get out.

“Are you ok?”
Cee hears someone shout.

Cee looks up
to see a ladder drop.

Will he take the help
to get back to the top?

The first step
is always the hardest part.

Opening up
is a good place to start.

“Being judged
won’t bother me.”

“Being happy,
I will fight to be!”

Behind The Depression Hole

Message from the author:

I just wrote a story about a panda dealing with his depression that feels like a hole he can’t get out of. I wrote the story based off of what I feel with my depression. I don’t have depression daily, but it does happen from time to time and when I do have depression it’s easy to get sucked into that hole. I know people that don’t suffer from depression think it’s as simple as just being sad and you need to “just not be sad.” Try to tell yourself to “just not be hungry” the next time that you’re hungry. It doesn’t work. It’s just what your body does. For me, depression is hating myself and feeling down about myself and my life. This is followed by feelings of “I shouldn’t be sad. I have a roof over my head, food, a job, a car.” These thoughts just make me feel worse about myself and make me hate myself more which just helps me slide further into my depression hole.

I lost a close friend to depression. The loss of Robin Williams hit me harder than I thought it would. I was told by a couple friends that they were surprised that I would be so brave to publicly say that I have depression and that I would open myself up to ridicule. I’m not doing this for people that don’t understand depression. I’m writing this and the story for people that suffer from depression. You’re not alone. Many people suffer from depression, most of them are probably people you would never guess. The thing that helped me the most was opening up about having depression. Yes, some people I thought would support me were the same people telling me to just not be sad. While some people I thought would make fun of me were some of the most supportive people. You’ll never know until you open up, but you have to take the first steps up the ladder to get out of your depression hole. Otherwise, you may never get out, or worse, you’ll fall deeper into the hole. Take the steps up the ladder and if you don’t think you have anyone to open up to, you can reach out to us or any social media groups that deal with depression. If you think you’re too far down your depression hole, don’t be afraid to call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-273-8255). There are people who can help you, just take that first step. You can help others by being around for them.

Depression doesn’t make us alone, it brings us together if we fight it together!